‘Have Sex With Older Woman,’ Feminist Advises Teen Virgin

Japanese feminist Ueno Chizuko tells boy to lose virginity by having sex with older woman

A leading Japanese feminist and social critic has shocked readers of the Asahi Shimbun by suggesting that a middle-school boy who was increasingly unable to control his sexual urges should ask a mature woman to allow him to have sex with her.

Ueno Chizuko, who is a well-known academic in Japan, wrote her reply to the boy, who had written asking for help, in the newspaper’s life advice column. Specifically, she spoke about the old Japanese custom of ‘fude-oroshi’, literally ‘dipping your brush in’, which is a euphemism for when men lose their virginity. This was usually done with an older woman, simply so that the boy would no longer be a virgin and could begin his life as an adult man.

Ueno’s suggestion apparently left readers astounded, and became an instant internet sensation.


Ueno Chizuko Tells Middle-School Boy ‘Ask a Mature Woman To Have Sex With You’, Shocking ‘Life Advice’

Sociologist Ueno Chizuko (64) shocked readers when in an Asahi Shimbun life advice column she replied to a male middle-school student whose problem was finding sexual relief that, “It’s best to ask a mature woman to let you have sex with her’.

Since in the article it appeared as though, had she been younger, Ueno would have wanted to help the middle-school boy to ‘dip his brush in’, comments such as ‘Is she right in the head?’ and ‘Is she promoting obscenity?’ immediately spread on Twitter.

The life advice column with Ueno’s reply was entitled ‘The Crucible of Anxiety’ which was carried in the ‘be’ magazine that came with the December 8 2012 edition of the Asahi Shimbun. The person asking the question was a 15 year old middle-school student, whose sexual desire had grown so strong that he couldn’t concentrate on studying for his [high-school] entrance exams. Although he relieved himself of sexual desire [through masturbation], he became horny when he saw cute girls. He was anxious that he would be unable to suppress the urge to touch a real girl’s body and would end up assaulting a girl walking at night.

In her reply, Ueno was unsympathetic, saying that it was because men are creatures who are at the mercy of their sexual desires. But that for a high-school student whose sexual desire ought to be at its peak, it was troublesome to actually go out with a girl, and explained that ‘What I want you to remember first of all, is that going out with a member of the opposite sex can be a pain. Although it’s a pain to be just friends with them, when you get into the kind of a relationship where they’ll take off their knickers off for you, it’s even more of a pain’, and instructed him that there were ways of having sex that could avoid this ‘trouble’.

‘Try asking a woman with a wealth of experience ‘Please have sex with me’ — you can even get down on your knees to ask’.

Of Ueno’s friends who had done this, it seemed that one out of ten times they’d been told ‘OK, let’s do it’. In the old days there were mature women who would help a boy ‘dip his brush in’ for the first time.

Ueno concluded with the words, ‘Even I, had I been younger….’, and advised that when the boy had accumulated enough experience, then he should ask a girl he really liked to have sex with him.

So if you kneel ten times you’ll be told it’s OK once?

The internet has been in an uproar about Ueno’s reply, and the topic spread rapidly on Twitter. While there are also those who have a favourable impression of the dramatically fresh approach to the issue, there have also been opinions such as ‘If I’d been young….I mean, wouldn’t a middle-school boy be totally traumatized by that?’, ‘This isn’t really something you’d say to a middle-school student’, and ‘Don’t the PTA have something to say about this? It must have something to do with the Child Welfare Law or Obscenity Bill’.

It was even taken as a talking point on the Tokyo MX TV programme ‘5pm Obsession Saturday!’ broadcast on December 8, 2012, and the comedian Tamabukuro Sujitarou said that all he’d understood from it was that if you ask a mature woman to have sex with you, you’ll be told it’s OK one out of ten times, so throughout the programme he kept on kneeling down and asking.

Comments from Itai News:

Posted by \ヤミノホノオニダカレテ/:

I vomited.

Posted by 名無しのサッカープレイヤー:

Absolutely no way…

Posted by   :

If it had been the other way around, and a man had been telling a woman this, then they’d have had a more thorough bashing online I guess…

Posted by   :

Sorry, anyone mind if I puke?

Posted by   :

Do it for real, then you’ll get reported to the police.

Posted by … :

Like a virgin would understand the value of a mature woman.

Posted by   :

They could catch some strange disease and the future of a young person with no prospects in life would be pretty bleak. It’s just too big a risk.

Posted by   :

So it would be possible for an old bloke to have sex with a female middle-school student, then? Good question by me.

Posted by    :

What the hell do they mean by a problem with sexual relief w Don’t talk about it like it’s a social problem w So trivial w

Posted by 八神はやて :

(-_-;) I hate women who’ve abandoned all sense of shame…

Posted by ミ☆:

If a guy said that in the middle of the street he’d be reported.

Posted by うん :

No matter how strong a teenage boy’s sexual desire was, hags in their 50’s and 60’s really stink, the stench of their breath, of their bodies. Their skin is also dirty. Most of the time they wouldn’t go through with it.

Posted by   :

I think that it’s best to just go out with someone close to your own age, otherwise it’s vulgar.

Posted by VIPPERな名無しさん :

Seems like Professor Ueno’s lifework has been deflating dicks…When I was younger she was a scary old woman, used to make me flinch with fear.

Posted by   :

Can’t she just say what she thinks? The world isn’t just all sweetness and light.

Posted by   :

I think it’s going a bit far if you do it with someone who’s over fifty, but it’s better than being a virgin I reckon.

Posted by 名無し:

I couldn’t forgive a sweet middle-school student being sullied by an old hag. Even if the boys are begging for it…that’s a big mistake.

Posted by   :

It happens. But is it OK just to do it out of sexual desire?

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  • YourSupremeCommander

    Spread ’em Ueno Chizuko, I will have sex with you first.

  • vanyuelding

    men are creatures who are at the mercy of their sexual desires…very true indeed

    • mr.wiener

      At that age guys [15] we are just a life support system for a penis. I like being older, I can actually have a conversation with a woman without staring at her boobs too often.

      • Jahar

        I love that you add “too often”. How much is “too often?” every 5 seconds? what is the acceptable amount? 7? 9? I don’t think i can do any better than that. But glances, not stares.

  • Moniisek

    (LoL, School Days anyone? )
    Well I guess it wasn’t a bad idea – a hundred years ago perhaps.

  • 3ayo

    “Like a virgin would understand the value of a mature woman.”

    LOL some grown men still don’t.
    Anyways, a 15 year old having sex with another teen, or woman twice his age or older, is just too soon. Now if he were 17, and at or close to the age of consent, I wouldn’t be furious so long the woman wasn’t too old (40s/50s). It would still make me a tad bit uncomfortable, but that’s it. If she were his age I’d just right it off so long protection was used. However, if the roles were reversed (17 y.o. girl sleeping with another teen or say a 35 year old man) I’d be pissed; especially if it was my daughter. Yeah, I know it’s a double standard.

  • ChuckRamone

    Did she suggest where to find such an older woman? Is he supposed to just walk down the street propositioning older women?

  • Ruaraidh

    Haha she’s dropping a hint, I bet she left her number at the bottom.

  • pickles

    coz if an older woman gets accidentally pregnant she wont be asking for child support from a young jobless student. Plus, you need some practice before doing it with a hot young chick to make a good impression to keep them coming for more. .lol

  • Lovely

    what is with asians and their desire for young ass? it’s like, once a woman is over 30 they consider them useless and unattractive. such an extremely shallow culture of people.

    • linette lee

      That can be said about many cultures, not just Asians.

      • G$

        BUT it is most pronounced in Asian cultures. Basing this on my experience living in China and Taiwan. I can honestly say everyone should actually ignore Linette, she is using a typical Asian tactic here. Whenever you try to have a conversation with Asians about something in their country, etc, they get very defensive and have to point out that your country does it too or that other people do it, they aren’t the only one. This is just an inherent part of their culture that I think a good many of them don’t really think about or realize.

        • linette lee

          ………….BUT it is most pronounced in Asian cultures………….

          Listen to the way you talk. Do I need to say more.

          • Jahar

            It’s definitely more acceptable in Asia, regardless of how common it is in other places. Only here can a 27 year old date a pre-teen, and people ask “Where’s MY man?”, instead of “where are the police?”

        • Chell-Bell

          Well the person did call the Asian culture/ people extremely shallow. Anyone would have become offended with a comment like that and would be quick to defend it. luckily its only that persons opinion.

          • Don’t take Lovely seriously, Chell-Bell. She has outed herself many times on these boards as a malicious race-bating troll. There is no use talking sense to her, she doesn’t have any.
            Just about everyone on these boards has an implicit interest in Asian cultures (in this case, Japanese culture), and I believe that most of us are not racists like Lovely.
            However, race is an unavoidable issue, as the topic is raised non-stop, sometimes for legitimate reasons, and sometimes by tolls (such as in this case). I suppose if enough people flagged the blatantly racist posts, the ones devoid of any conversational value, that might prompt the moderators to do something about it.

  • Matt

    Here’s something you don’t see on koreaBANG…

  • Paul M

    As 3ayo said, 15 is a little too soon but nevertheless a great idea. My first time was with an older woman and it was fantastic. I was horny, nervous and completely clueless and if I had been with another virgin it would have been an unmitigated disaster. However she was relaxed and took control and told me what to do and what she liked which prevented it all from becoming embarrassing and frustrating.

    • the ace of books

      This is a good post. I high-five this post from the other end of the internet.

      • Paul M

        *is too busy looking at the keyboard and gets smacked in the head by a high five* Thank you kind sir.

  • PixelPulse

    She would make a great addition to Cosmos Sex Advice team.

  • the ace of books

    Same old, same old about older women and younger guys. The Ace declares this bullshit. Nothing wrong with the pairing nor with anyone in one. Anyone objecting can gtfo.

    PS: google “Helen Mirren Bikini”, and I rest my case.

    • YourSupremeCommander

      you would tap that?

      • the ace of books

        If I had interest in sex in the first place, maybe.

      • mr.wiener

        most definitely.

  • Your Sexy Cousin Rex

    This is some AV shit my niggas

  • Any women that is older than 30 for a teen is not good at all.

  • Relivash

    Dude, when someone says “mature woman”, it’s obviously some 40+ hag; if not simply some post-menopause woman who doesn’t have a mate to get off with

  • As a woman, I have no respect for such people claiming to be ‘feminists’. The hypocrisy is that if an older man suggested for young teenage girls to lose their virginity to older men, there would be outrage. She’s just a radical, very left wing feminist who doesn’t represent all Japanese women. I hate women like her.

  • Pickle

    Go ahead and send the older asian women who want younger guys my way!!

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